In my last article I shared how over the past three decades there have been several changes to help put an end to bullying in the schools. According to Stopthebullying.gov forty nine states now have anti-bullying laws in place and many schools have policies in place with “zero tolerance” but for many targets of a bully this is not a enough.
If you are a parent of a target of a bully you too must not leave it up to the school to solve the problem, because in most cases they won’t. You need to get involved. Dan Olweus says that “you should contact the child’s teacher as soon as possible. The goal should be to achieve cooperation with the school about the problem. “
As I mentioned in many other articles you need to keep your personal baggage at home and stay focused on what is happening to your child. Be specific and make sure you follow up with the teacher, principal or social worker regularly.
“The squeaky wheel gets the grease”
Here is a letter from a parent that attended my teacher/parent night “Stop the Bullying” presentation. Her son Colt was targeted by a bully. When she found out she contacted the principal and they took some action but Colt was still being bullied. She remembered what I shared in my program to keep contacting the school until there is an end to the aggressive behavior.
Here is what she did:
“I contacted the school counselor and asked that she please get involved. I know that she met with Colt and he felt better after the meeting. I also contacted the teacher again explaining the manipulation this boy was using and how that can be confusing to Colt. The boy claims to be a friend yet treats Colton horrible. She was surprised to hear, because this young man is shy. After she heard the behind the scene details she also met with the bully and warned him. She talked to Colton and explained that it was a poisonous friendship. Soon after that the bully picked another victim and Colt stood up to him, and reported to the teacher. She then came down hard on him and met with the parents. They have not had any trouble since then. This is a perfect example of why the adults NEED to be involved in giving the kids the tools they need to solve these issues that arise when there is lack of supervision at home and school.”
Thanks for all you do,
This is a perfect example of how parental involvement can put an end to your child’s bullying issues, if handled correctly will pay it forward the message to other children like Colton to inspire them to report when other students are being bullied too.
1) Find out the facts from your child and write them down
2) Stay focused and share those facts with the teacher or principal
3) Follow-up, Follow-up, Follow-up
4) Keep a record
5) Don’t stop till you put an end to it